Shotgun rules

One of the most critical skill to have in life is the art of the shotgun, knowing when to call, the speed of the actual call and calling rules. It's as important as buying life insurance. Well, not really, but you get the point.

So what is "calling shotgun"?

Calling shotgun means getting first dibs on the suggested object or deed. It means whoever called it first gets to enact said action on it first.

Shotgun rules:

Car
Rule 1: The power of shotgun is absolute and binding. The first person who calls shotgun gets to sit in the front.
Rule 1a: This rule can only be overturned if a) The driver denies the shotgun call, b) The car owner denies the shotgun call and/or c) The car is a two-seater and your fat-ass friend can't fit in the back.
Rule 2: The shotgun call is only valid if the caller sees the car. If the caller does not see the car and calls shotgun anyway, he loses his chance to call shotgun for that turn.
Rule 3: The shotgun call is only valid if there are no positions in the car. If say buddy A always sits behind the driver seat, then calling shotgun on a particular occasion is invalid.

Dating
Rule 1: The power of shotgun is absolute and binding. If a buddy calls shotgun on a girl that you all met at the same time, the buddy gets first dibs on the girl.
Rule 1a: This rule can only be overturned if a) Your buddy called shotgun on another girl last time out and didn't do anything with it, b) Your buddy calls shotgun too many times, this means the shotgun calling buddy gives dibs on the other buddies, c) Your buddy keeps on getting all the action, meaning he is obliged to give you your chance providing you dont screw it up.
Rule 2: If you're at a bar/party and your buddy called shotgun, he gets first dibs. If you spot another hot girl, the buddy who called cannot call anymore for the rest of the night.
Rule 3: If said girl is a friend of your buddy (meaning he met her first), then its automatically assumed that he gets first dibs and will be assumed until he verbally gives up said priviledge.
Rule 4: The biggest exception is the "true feelings" argument. If your buddy called shotgun on said girl, he can only be obliged to give it up if you develop "true feelings" for said girl.
Rule 4a: True feelings can be explained by a) real tears (if your buddy does this over some new girl, you are given the right to stone him or knock him senseless), b) passive-aggressive behaviour and c) using the term "true feelings" (stoning is also allowed here).
Rule 4b: mis-using the term "true feelings" enables you to make your buddy wear an "I love the Titanic T-shirt."
Rule 5: If said girl has already been met by everyone, calling shotgun in her abscence is allowed. If no one has met said girl, calling advanced shotgun is prohibited.
Rule 6: Calling shotgun on a buddy's mother, sister, daughter, cousin or any related kin are grounds for being severely beaten with a sharp object.
Rule 7: Calling shotgun on your own current girlfriend is grounds to have to wear a "Hi. My name is Doug Christie" jersey (providing you clean it up after use and properly return it to Franz so he can wear it again).

That's the shotgun rules for vehicles and dating.

If any such ammendment is needed or advised, please comment.