Monday, April 10, 2006

The Phenomenology of E

I just came from a full week in Boracay partying in the name of 4 years of diligent responsibility and the occassional hard drink-tambay until morning routine in the Ateneo. Yet there's one thing i never got to understand during those four years: the upper crust clubbing scene/house music partying scene. I always felt that there were two great evils existing in that world. 1.) Men were there to get a one night stand at best, and at worst, get to grope other women. and 2.) Women liked being groped at and taken advantage of, probably some socio-psychological frustration they get high on. Needless to say, being jeco, these assertions of course vomit of prejudice.

On the first night I told my friend of the one thing i haven't done in college and I wanted to try it, I wanted to go full cicle and try what they're taking, not pussy ass dope, but full blast pills, what the hell it's bora. Thus, amidst our hand-carried sound system, dimmed down lights, and around a 20 sq. meter hotel room including the balcony, all 12 of us got hit either by one shot, 1.5 some even chased down 2.

The whole group was surpisingly supportive. Apparently they were really appreciative of a "virgin" (forgive the connotations of the term). Their reactions were far from what i prejudged. They were supportive not in the sense of wanting me to be addcted to it, but wanting me to have fun in the safe (ironic) full bodied way. They told me that for the night, they were there to attend to my needs and that i shoud just take it as it comes. It had a weird sense of security and support that i never expected from them. They were there to educate and guide and they loved the role, they lived the role everytime they handled a virgin. On the receiving end, the sincerity of these people were overwhelming and flattering.

After an hour or so it kicked in, i seemed to be much more sensitive to everything all my senses were heightened. My eyes dilated and became much more sensitive to light, the blue lights we were playing with seemed to write things out of thin air, my sense of smell became more sensitive and taking whiffs off the inhaler i had seemed to elevte everything, the beat of the music being played got me to move and want to jump up and down continuously couple this with my heart pounding much harder than normal, it seemed that i was working out and had to run or do something cardiovascular just to catch up to it, my skin was more sensitive to touch and we were all giving wach other massages and touching and hugging each other.

All of these however were just empirical changes, scientifically measured phenomena in the human body as a result of the chemicals running through my system. But something in the camaraderie present that night went beyond scientific alterations to the brain. Everybody was more open, more accepting, more appreciative of each other, myself included. I was able to open up to total strangers and them to me, and we were all able to understand each other. I was actually thankful for being able to open up to these people and more so thankful for them being accepting. I wouldn't want to oversell the actual act of partying but it really made me good friends with the people i was with that night. It turns out that while I was getting high on their attention, giving and taking care of others in turn also gets other people rolling. In a sense it's an odd but beautiful sense of camaraderie. That's the aspect of partying that i never understood before and that I fully appreciate now, that as cheesy as it sounds, it realy makes good solid friendships.

And hence prejudice once again is redirected. Let me get this straight first, there's absolutely no justification for partying. It really is bad for you. however understanding the attractive side to it adds some notches in the experience category; i've learned how people get addicted to it, it makes every moment more special, more sensuous, it makes you live more. Not to say that we should all do it, i can't stress that addiction is an absolute evil, but that even with such a negative thing in the world, it exists because people want it to, I now understand why they do.

P.S. I don't think i'll ever do it again, that is anywhere outside boracay :)

1 comment:

peppericious said...

that's a lot of scientific and experiential analysis. personally, i would have just posted "i got high. it was cool.", but whatever works heh.